


jedi ass-cademy

by lenin_it_to_win_it



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: A/B/O, Mpreg, Multi, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-07-02 05:32:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15789951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lenin_it_to_win_it/pseuds/lenin_it_to_win_it
Summary: kylo ren tries to become a top to please rey





	jedi ass-cademy

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday mia i hope u die in a fire before during or after reading this so i never have to create such a horrible gift for you again

Jedi Ass-cademy 

 

“oh rey-senapi” kylo ren whimpered seductively as he spread his fuzy bee ass for rey. “cut up my anus with ur lite sord! my bodey is ready!”

 

“the only thing ur redy for is some respecting women juce BICHT” rey yelled angrily as she cut of kylo rens ass hole with her big stick and not in a sex way “im gonna hav 2 tech u a lesson” she pured as she poked him in the eyeball wich he had bc he wuz a bee like in the bee move a classic of sinema 

 

but be4fore rey could teach him the lesson bee bee 8, who was made of 8 bees, sauntered in with his 8 inch bee dick hard and EREKCT!!!! “ay yo where the wite women at” he said like a chadTM

 

“RIGHT EHERE” ray scremeed as she egerly impaled herself on the bee cock. “PUT YUOR EGGS IN ME DADY”

 

rose tiko cried bc she was not a wite women and the be did not fucc her. the only fuc she got was fucked over by gresy assholes on twitter 

 

Rose Whatever the fuck the lemons mans last name is cried bc not enuff people beat thier nuts to her very wel ritten nighteye x present mice all abt that basesongfic/kpop au

 

While they were crieing B B 8 spanked rey without hands and smirked witout mouth and looked directly into kylo rens stupid cuck eyes. “top kek get rekt scrub”

 

Kyloe ren let out in impotenent rore of RAGE and CRIED TEARS bc hhe kicked his bed in sexuel frustrated and stubbed his foot in spite of his darth vader crocs then he went to huxes bed room so he could crie some mor

  
“HUXXXXXX REY WONT LEMME SMAAAAAASSHSHHHHHHH” he wept sadfully with his head on huxes lap

 

hux was 2 busy reading atlas shrugged so he didnt say anythign an d kylo went outside to a sad old tre full of books so he cold cry amidst the nature for a change of senery. A thicc blue alien with tig ol bidens came perambulating about with its boobs and milk and kylo ren sobbed even more hystericaller bc it reminded him of rey “SENPAI WHY WONT U NOTICE MEEHHHHHH??!????? WHY WOLD U CUCK ME FOR THAT POSER PREP BB8???”  


just then a mysterious old man stopped vigorosly slorping milk from the tiddy long enoff to dispense wisdom! once he was dun busting a nut he decieded 2 talk to kylo ren too. “wat u need is to lern how not to be such a whiney emo thot” he sed declaritively 

 

kylo ren wiped his nose on the sleve of his darth vader onesie. “are u saying I need a techer??” he asked questioningley.

 

the old man took one more slorp of tiddy for good measure and winked sexily “no kylo ren,, u need a dADDY, one to teach u the wayes of being an ALPHA and a TOP insted of a BICH and a BOTTOM”

 

Kylo ren started unbottoning the ass flap of his onesie “take me now” he yodeled breathlessley

 

The old man was disgcusted! “dont b NASTE im ur UNCLE lube skyboner!!! Dont u recognize me from wen I tried 2 kil u last week???” 

 

“o ya” sed kylo sadly “so I gess we cant fuck”

 

“not us…….” sad luke suggestively “but I know someone who CAN” 

 

after 3 human sacrifices and several protracted milk breaks LOOBE SKYBONER SOMMONED YOGA!!!!!1!!

 

“ehhhh an omega u are” he sed disprovingly slaping kylo ren with his long wood while also walking around with a cane. “with my seed i must clense u”  


kyloe ren bared his bootyhole tearfuly. “teach me in the wayes of the force sensei yoda-chan”  
  
“mmm forcign ur butthole out of shape I will be” Yoda grunted as he slipped slickly into kylo rens tite little ass. “take this cock you cannot” 

 

“i can take anything” kylor ren snarled hornily as tears and nut slid down his face “ecept movies were dogs die that makes me sad”

 

“mmm reminding me, that is…” yota puleld a vcr and caseete tape out of his asshole wich was so lose that they both plopped right out easily like newborn eg. “old yeller we must watch”  
  
“NOOOOOOOOO” kylo ren wept weepingly “HOW CAN I NUT UNDER SUCH TRAGEC CIRCUMSISIONS????” 

 

 

“pain an alpha must handle!” yoda yelled forcefuley as he continued to ride kylo ren like the slutty cock carosel he was “not only phsysical, emotional too MMMMM?????” 

 

They fucked during the 2 hours of old yeler and kylo ren crieed the whole time but his butthole grew 3 sizes that day so it was a succ (hehe) cess. He wuz almost redy. almos

 

“give birth now u must” yoda sed wisely as he retracted his jabba the nutt from kylo rens jabba the butt.   
  
“WAHT??” Kylo ren shrieked shockedly and covering with a protective hand over his asscheeks “BU-BUT HOW????”

 

“those damb midiclorians” muttered lube skynutter as he squezed a seal alien nipple and cot a stream of its milk into his mouth. “i cant tel u how many butt abortions ive had over the years”  
  
“MMMURDER, ABORTIONS ARE!!!!” yoda schreeched, slapping lube in the face and also the scrotom with his tiny lizard puppet hands “BEGIN AT CONCEPTION, LIFE DOES!!!1!”

 

“its not a REAL baby its a FEETUS” lube retorted atheisticly

 

Kylo Ron sweated hornily “feet u say? u kno wat” he sed nonchalanatly as he caressed his rapidly swelling left buttchek where he had the baby growing “i think me and this baby r gonna get along just fine”

 

In 9 months he birthed a hideos babby with kyle rens gresy emo hare and yodes rancid cottege cheese skin and monster size muppet dick

 

 

“father” it sed in a deep rumbling voice “i crave nourisment” 

 

Yode kylo rennesaince and lube all exchanged long and solem glances

 

5 minutes later the baby had ben tied 2 a rock and drowned at the bottom of the space ocean

 

“an abomination against nature, that was” yoda shivered disgustedly “going to hell, i am….”

 

“who cares abt or mortol souls DUMB BASS” kylo ren roared angrely. “i still ned to get LAYED by REY”  
  
“u mean reyed” suggested lube skyboner laughingly

 

“I CAME UP WITH THAT MYSELF FIRST BUT I DIDNT SAY IT BC IT WAS TOO STUPID AND DUMB AND LAME SHUT UP” kylo west yelled infuriatedly and jealously “anyway wat did ANY of this hav 2 do with making me les of a cuck????”

 

“hardships, you have undergone” sed yoda seriously “an omega, no longer you will b”  
  
“im an alpha now?????” Kylo ren asked hopefuly.  
  
“mmmm” youda caressed his ballsack thoutfully. “beta, at best you are”

 

“but if u hang around her long enuff and were a fedora she mite giv u a pity fuck anyway” lube suggested from his years of expereience

 

“CLOSE ENOUG” cried kylo ren triumpantly as he nut rocketed his way back 2 jakkof “MOMTHER IM HAVE RETURNED!!!1!”

 

rey sighed tiredly from the bed where she was letting b b 8 shove his buzzing stinger up her hole “oh. hi ben” 

 

“ben? Whomstve is that mladie?” Kylo ren asked in mock surprise turning aroudn to look for this strange “‘’ben”””. “i am not ‘’’ben’’ im-“ he tore of his cloths to expose his flaccid tiddies “A TOP”  
  
“like hell fuck u are” rey cried indignantly “on the top cover of ‘bottom bich weekly’ mayebe”

 

“u dont understand ive CHANGED rey!!!1!” kylo ren cried angrily and also in tears “ive gone thru the jedi ASS-cademy and I granuated TOP of my clASS” 

  
“that sounds like a bad prono” sed rey unimpressedly   
  
“but now im redy to make a GOOD porno” sed kylo ren sexily as he touched reys hand with his big toe “with u… YODA HIT THE MUSIC” yull be back from hamiloton started playing and kylo ren did a striptease to it but only with pants bc he took off his shirt alreedy. 

 

rey watched with dead eyes until the music stoppd and kylo ren was completey naked. His ass was covered in strech marks from when he birthed out a baby from it and on his left nut there was a scratch and sniff tatto of darth vader that smelled like sweaty lether and burnt sand. 

 

rey sigehed. the troth was,, she had fucked b b 8 so many times and so perfectly that it was starting nto to have the same thril anymor. Sometims she was almost NOT 100% perfectly satisfied by the secks!!! but… if she fucked klyo ren,, it wold definitely show her how good she had it and put everythign into perspective once and 4 all. 

 

“ok just ONCE ill let u TRY to fuck me” sed rey unenthusiasticaly. “but just bc its ur birthday”

 

kylo ren was confussled. “but its not my birthday”

 

rey looked str8 intot he camera. ‘i know”

 

they made the sex and it wus every bit as sad and regrettable as u wold expect. Kylo ren tried to top for 5 seconds but his tattood nut fell of from the pressure and he had to dig arond under the bed to go get it and rey got bored and started watching wooky porn befor having a 4some with gost yoda lube and b b 8 the end 

**Author's Note:**

> mia. this didnt have to exist. i didnt WANT this to exist, but you forced my hand, just as you forced your way through your mothers birth canal. congratulations.


End file.
